GE 2020 – The Fianna Fail Manifesto

With the General Election fast approaching DTTN has offered the main political parties the chance to present their manifestos to our readers. Today we hear from Fianna Fail councillor Eddie Cash.

    Fine Gael have broken Ireland. Tin Man Kenny teed us up and social media influencer Varadkar knocked us out of the fecking park. But, what more would you expect from the Blueshirts?

  Vote Fianna Fail and we will rebuild the country, brick by brick, development by ill-advised development. We might not take the actions that the country wants, or needs, but the one thing we can guarantee is action. And lots of it.

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Fianna Fail Gombeens getting personal


Not content with voting for each other in the Dail, Fianna Fail gombeens Timmy Dooley and Niall Collins’ complex relationship has crossed into their home lives.

 Limerick West TD Collins has voted six times for Dooley when the Clare TD couldn’t be arsed doing his job. He has also been filling in at the Dooley household, carrying out husbandly duties when Dooley fancies pints with the lads.

    “It’s a long way home from Leinster House, and I often can’t face it,” admitted Dooley. “Niall’s a great man for the driving, and sure when you’re from a place like Patrickswell a night in Ennis is the height of excitement.”


     Collins is believed to have deputised for Dooley on a number of occasions, attending family meals and functions.

     “I usually send him over when the mother-in-law is visiting,” said Dooley, “or if the wife is hosting a dinner party.”

    So frequent are Collins’ visits that he has now taken up semi-permanent residence in the Dooley’s spare bedroom.

    “The cranks will say it’s making a mockery of marriage, but sure the wife loves him,” said Dooley, “and he knows how to press all the right buttons. I usually can’t perform my duties after a feed of pints.”