Simon Harris – The nation reacts as android becomes Taoiseach

Simon Harris, the Paranoid Android, has made history by becoming the first non-carbon based entity to become Taoiseach.

To celebrate this momentous occasion DTTN has canvassed opinions from the great, the good and the Healy-Raes of Irish public life.

Leo was the first gay son of immigrants. Now Simon is the first android. Maybe in another ten years Ireland might actually be ready for a woman Taoiseach. Fingers crossed.

Heather Humphreys; Deputy Leader Fine Gael

Tis a disgrace! Michael is the one true leader of our country. He’s knows what the people of Kerry, and most importantly, the people of Kilgarvan need! A pox on you all!

Danny Healy-Rae; Kerry man

Well, sure, isn’t he only great craic! An android, hah? Who’d have thought it? Stay tuned as we’ll be sharing recipes for watery stews and thin soups inspired by the man himself. Hah!

Daithi O’Se; Kerry man & broadcaster

I have a million ideas, but they all point towards certain death.

Marvin; Paranoid Android, Cousin of Harris.

He can keep his hands off my fucking Oscar.

Cillian Murphy, Actor & langer

Why do I bother anymore? They may as well make my Nespresso machine Taoiseach.

Michael D. Higgins; President & coffee lover

And the last word goes to the man himself –


Simon Harris; Taoiseach, Paranoid Android

Spread the love

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *