Local man to become celebrity chef

A local man has decided to become a celebrity chef after spending many hours watching cookery programmes on television.

Gordon Lardon (27) told DTTN that it was his time to shine after hours watching The Great British Menu, MasterChef and The Restaurant.

“I don’t actually cook, I’m more of a takeaway man,” said Lardon. “But I feel I’ve absorbed a lot of technical skill by osmosis. My specialities are usually toast or beans on toast, but I could stretch to a bit of avocado or cheese, if needed.”

Lardon has also spent time studying Kitchen Nightmares to understand potential industry pitfalls.

“All I need to do is not be shit or work with family members. When in doubt I’ll just start shouting about how great I am. I can smell the book deal from here.”

Family and friends have encouraged Lardon to take time to learn the basics, such as turning on the oven, but he has already quit his job and applied for a loan to open a new restaurant in town.

“Go big or go home; it’s all about the brand,” he said. “My food will have the ruthless honesty of Ramsay, the funky condescension of Oliver and the sex appeal of Nigella. Beans on toast will never be the same again.”

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