Martin and Varadkar pay tribute to Collins, shame his legacy

An Taoiseach Micheal Martin and Tanaiste Leo Varadkar have paid tribute to Michael Collins in a special ceremony at Beal na Blaith to commemorate the 100 year anniversary of his death.

“Michael Collins was killed for standing up his convictions,” said Martin. “Thankfully that would not happen today, as we no longer require our politicians to have any. We just muddle through and get re-elected every five years without fixing anything.”

“It’s heart-warming to see Fine Gael and Fianna Fail coming together to honour our great patriot,” said Varadkar. “Michael would be delighted to see that our two great political parties have put our differences aside to essentially morph into a two backed non-descript beige entity.”

“A vote for Fine Gael is essentially a vote for Fianna Fail,” chimed in Martin. “And it’s comforting for Irish citizens to know that while individual politicians may come and go, nothing will ever really change. That’s what Michael Collins fought for.”

“Other countries produce extremists on the far-right and the far-left,” said Varadkar, “but here in Ireland the only extremes we will tolerate are extreme sameness and that’s something we can all be proud of.”

Remembrance activities will conclude tonight with a special screening of Neil Jordan’s Michael Collins biopic. Rotten fruit will be available for viewers to throw whenever Alan Rickman appears on screen as Eamon De Valera.

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